Dust off Your Crown

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I hope this post reaches you, I hope that it causes you to step back for a second and think. Just a disclaimer: This post is personal, sorry to do it to ya but every once and awhile it’s needed; every once and while I need to express what’s going on in my head through the form of writing, and more often I need to express those feelings with other people, hence the public post.Are you a fan of long car rides? I sure am! And I’m certain that the man I marry will be too. It’s the simplest, yet extremely freeing experience of staring out the window and letting the mind wander. This past week I was given an extensive amount of time to enjoy this experience on my 15+ hour ride to Florida with my family. Although my knees and hips were ready to get out by the time we reached the house, my mind had more than enough time to think, to not think, to relax and to meditate on things that were worth meditating on.One of my favorite books in the bible to read is Esther, so naturally you could imagine that me (someone who loves watching movies) would enjoy the film One Night with the King. Now, let’s pause for a minute, if you haven’t seen this movie you need to see it after you read the story in the bible, just so you will be able to tell what’s factual and what’s creative flare. Not only did God use Esther in an extraordinary way, but also she demonstrated exactly how a lady should act, exactly how a queen should be. And although I’d like to believe that I conduct myself as lady, I was guilty of forgetting that I am the daughter of King, a princess on the way to becoming a queen.My crown was collecting dust, not because I was trying to forget who I was, but because I had allowed the enemy to convince my mind in a twisted way that I wasn’t worth wearing it. My dear friend Pearl Tenny gave me a great read, Gentlewoman: Etiquette for a Lady, from a Gentleman. The book had several insights, things I knew of, things I learned and things I needed to be reminded of again.“Don’t let ‘reality’ make you lose faith in God and gain faith in man. Don’t put your joy in man because when man leaves, there goes your joy. The world didn’t give you your joy and the world can’t take it away. Your value isn’t in the hands of people, and your worth was determined when you got here… You’re the daughter of the King of Kings, and your worth extends beyond the clouds…” ---- Enitan O. Bereola IIGuilty as charged! I had fallen into exactly what I was reading. I had allowed my faith in man to grow and I put my joy in things that had no power to give me my joy. I would like to believe that I didn’t allow the hands of people to determine my value, but I did allow the devil to.A few weeks back I had a long look in the mirror, not to see what are physical insecurities were there, but to adjust my posture; to lift my head up, push my shoulders back and to look myself in the eyes and tell myself who I was, whom I had forgotten.I think in today’s society, being a lady isn’t something that’s necessarily praised. And although I wasn’t always fond of trying to fit in, I would say that what led me to this point was trying to please certain people in my life. The twisted way that the devil had convinced me that I needed to please them, that if I couldn’t keep these people happy that there was something wrong with me, that I would lose worth.What a wonderful feeling revelation is, when all the things you had convinced yourself were factual aren’t true. That’s where I’m at now, in the realization stage. Nothing is ever perfect and it’s all a growing process, but it’s still progress. I’m reaffirming myself and allowing God to heal areas that were damaged, remove bitterness and anger, and fill me up with joy. Allowing Him to remind me that I am His daughter, and that my crown was meant to sit firmly on my head.Xoxo, Kelsley 

Lions, Turtles and Buffalo, Oh My!

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Every once and awhile I'm reminded by a little person the importance of life itself and how it's the little things that we seem to forget are key. My cousin and her adorable son, Isaiah, which many of you have probably seen on my Instagram, invited me on their playdate to see the movie "Inside Out" and go to the County Zoo. Exploring the adventures of a child's mind and experiencing what adventures warm their heart was extraordinary.Inside Out, a movie that is based on the inside of a child's brain really captured my heart. It made me appreciate the joys, the pain, the love and the anger that we each experience in our lives. Shed a few tears, not gonna lie. The movie  was put together very nicely and was enjoyable for people of all ages, young and old. Now onto the zoo. This is my second time coming to this zoo with Isaiah and it's amazing how time flies. I remember holding his hand (he was about 2, now he's going on 5) and he asked me if I could touch what is one of the biggest things I'm afraid of, snakes! Thankfully this time we didn't run into any. Check out the pictures below.
  

If it's your birthday make some noise!

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I will always love birthday celebrations, I may not always want to do something grand, but a small get together with friends and family is all i need.22. It was time for a change and the change I decided to make was a little bit drastic. I cut my hair! but no regrets so far, I'm loving it! This was the first birthday from what I can remember that it rained, but instead of being down about it, I took it as God standing right behind me as I've realized that it's time to wash away the old things and step into the new! I'm ready for it.Thank you to all my friends and family, present and far, that made this birthday year very special to me.Pics below!
Celebrations~ Yay!

"We talked all night about the rest of our lives, where we're gonna be when we turn 25"

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Graduation Day:6:45 am: Just finished decorating my graduation cap with my other two roommates. Realizing the time, I only had about 15 minutes to sleep before having to get moving. Showered and when I came out, my hair surprised me. To my disappointment I didn’t like it but there really wasn’t enough time to fix it, I had to graduate! Fully dressed with no food in my stomach, no water to re-hydrate me, and with minimal amount of deodorant, very big mistake, I was out the door and up the hill towards the Basilica lawn.When I tell you the Lord must really love me even through all of my dumb mistakes; His love is unfailing. Saturday was scheduled to rain, heavy, thunderstorms. Most of my classmates were “hoping” for the rain instead of the unbearable heat, but I am not a fan of rain, especially not on a big day like this. I wanted the sun and that’s definitely what I got. It was 90 degrees and the humidity was on 1000.I would like to say that my graduation ceremony lasted about 4 hours (in my mind about 15), and lucky me for being apart of the School of Arts & Sciences, I got to stay outside for the whole ceremony, while the other schools went to their perspective locations under tents. I do not think I’ve ever sweated the way I did on graduation day. It was almost as if I was sitting in a sauna with a chinchilla on!Finally the time came for me to receive my diploma. I had sworn to my friends that if my name was pronounced Kels-ey, I would not walk across the stage, and this was my plan. But when finally stood up, my body was telling me “You need to get across that stage as quickly as possible and back to your seat.” You see, I have a tendency to pass out, not often but enough that when it happens my mother doesn’t run out of the room looking for the nearest hospital. I guess she’s used to it. What can I say, I’m a little girl and my body can only handle so much.I stood up to walk towards the stage and my knees were shaking, I was certain that it was only nerves at first, but when I looked down at my hands, they were shaking too. All I was thinking was “Jesus please, if I’m going to pass out, let it be once I get back to my seat, not in the middle of the stage for the Class of 2015 and all of their families to see and remember.” I got to the top of steps and of course, the announcer pronounced my name wrong, I began to lean over to correct him, but I felt light -headed. I quickly began to laugh, and floated across the stage, down the steps and back to my seat.I think that my bodily experience was appropriate this day, because it was exactly how I was feeling mentally. I didn’t realize I was graduating, it was a surreal experience and it was as if I stepped out of my body. I couldn’t really explain what was going on at the time.Well, here I am two weeks later, feeling the reality of the situation. I have mixed emotions for sure. Part of me is excited to take on this new chapter of life, but the other part of me is nearly heartbroken. I love my friends too much, probably more than I express to them. These four years have changed me in many ways, whether good or bad, they were still moments that helped me grow and I feel now as if I leaving them behind. I’m going to miss being around these people and basically living with them; seeing them daily. It hurts for sure, but it’s just apart of life that I’m going to have to deal with and I’m certain that as time goes by I’ll adjust to it. I just hope that I’m able to bring these people with me into the next chapter of my life...